July 30, 2004
A rustling tumbleweed, perhaps
Does anyone really give a crap, really, about this whole Democratic National Convention thingy going on in Boston this past week? I mean seriously. Was there a single person in America who woke up any day this week saying: "I wonder what JFKerry is gonna say tonight!!!?" Or Barack Obama, or John Edwards, or Ted Kennedy? I mean, sure, there are some people whose speeches could have been interesting, and therefore might have been attended with some anticipation....
But really, did this overcovered overhyped hoopla really make a single difference in anyone's lives? I'd rather doubt it.
Posted by Matt at 1:24 AM
July 28, 2004
Iraqis to Michael Moore: STFU
Yeah, I'd be pissed too if terrorists where I lived were being vociferously praised for slaughtering innocent people.
Come to think of it, I didn't hear Michael Moore praising the heroic actions of Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols in their resistance against the American government...
Posted by Matt at 5:09 PM
Turning a phrase
James Taranto's wit isn't limited to the online pages of the Wall Street Journal; he seems to be a skilled verbal duelist as well:
Multitudes of boots are arranged carefully on the lawn, with a sign explaining, "These 907 pairs of boots represent the U.S. soldiers killed in the Iraq war." Then there's a sloppy pile of shoes with another sign: "These 1,000 pairs of shoes represent a small fraction of the estimated 16,000 Iraqis killed in the war."There are no million shoes for Saddam Hussein's Iraqi, Iranian and Kuwaiti victims; only his American victims seem to matter, and only those Iraqis killed in connection with a U.S. military intervention. ...
We approach a middle-aged man of ample girth, who seems to be in charge. "How many shoes do you have for Saddam Hussein's victims?" we ask.
He stands silent, facing us. He seems to be staring us down, but we have no way of knowing for sure, as he's wearing sunglasses, even though the day is overcast. Finally, after perhaps 15 seconds, he breaks the silence:
"Shame on you," he says.
He explains that his group has simply chosen--arbitrarily, if we understand him correctly--to highlight the U.S. soldiers and Iraqi civilians killed in the liberation. He offers an analogy: "There are books that are written about one thing, there are books that are written about other things."
We persist: Saddam's victims don't count unless they're American?
"Somebody else is dealing with that."
We point to the shoes representing the fallen soldiers: "Yeah, these guys are dealing with that."
Posted by Matt at 3:14 PM
Mental snapshot
At the moment, I'm thinking:
I wonder if Bob is going to re-link me now that I have the blog up and running again. Meanwhile, Carleton Sheets just kind of strikes me as an ass. Doesn't even have the cojones to tell his audience what he charges for his get-rich-in-real-estate program... he only tells you it's $9.95 to just try for thirty days. Sounds like a fantastic deal. Wonder how many mugs have experienced the shock to find on day 31 that their credit balance is a good $400 higher, sapping cash from their pocket at a good 18.65 percent compounded daily.
Posted by Matt at 7:51 AM
Mr. Fix-it
I just opened up an old Pioneer 6-disc CD changer, to see why it wasn't working. This was its final chance at a productive life; if I couldn't figure out what was ailin' the old girl, it would have had to set itself right with its maker (Pioneer) and prepare itself for a long rusting, wedged somewhere between some noisome dirty diapers, warping cardboard boxes and of course, maggot-infested banana peels.
So it turns out that a critical part of CD players is this little thing called a "lens". What's a lens? It's a tiny tiny little piece of precision-cut plastic that focuses the laser into a tiny tiny point. How tiny? Well, it's about the same size as a cockroach monocle, were roaches of the monocle-wearing persuasion. (In my experience with roaches, I don't think this is likely.) Without it, though, the laser can't tell if it's reading Tom Petty's Greatest Hits or a blueberry pancake. The lens was rolling around in the bottom of the player for God knows how long.
After various attempts to figure out how to re-seat the lens into its little lens-holder-thingy, I managed, with the help of some bathroom tweezers, a Q-tip, and some superglue, to get that darned roach monocle back in place. I turn the CD player on, and all of a sudden, it can read CDs again.
Technical genius, I am not. Compared to most of my friends, well, yeah, sure.
The upshot? I'm taking this 14-year-old bad boy to the pawn shop today to see if I can get a sawbuck for it. Probably be lucky to get a fiver. But this is what I do. I spend an hour to make five bucks. I'm sure there's added benefit in there too, such as learning about electronic equipment ca. 1990, or something more generalized like an overall curiosity about the world or the thrill of taking on an obscure challenge.
And I'm trying to bring back the term "sawbuck". A sawbuck is a ten-dollar bill. You know, the one with Alexander Hamilton on it. Or, in the near future, Ronald Reagan. Help me out, will you, and spread the word? (Literally, spread the word? Sawbuck?)
Posted by Matt at 7:40 AM
Feast or famine watch '04
Current status: Feast.
Too much on the plate right now. Partly due to procrastination, partly due to the sudden filling up of my schedule, and mostly due to a renewed sense of interest in getting busy and staying that way. I start my new job on Thursday (I couldn't wait until Monday), so Wednesday will be filled with all kinds of running around, trying to get as much done as possible, knowing it will be my last full day to do so in a long time. Apparently I get no sick days or personal days until six months into it.
So if you're in the Austin area tomorrow and see a tall guy running around resembling un pollo sin cabeza, be sure to yell out hello.
Posted by Matt at 1:15 AM
July 27, 2004
Word of the day
See previous post, update.
Posted by Matt at 6:02 PM
Wow...
Okay, so it's been over a year since I stopped regularly posting to this blog (and did I mention I'm back? Oh, yes, of course I did...). But I still get referrals in from google on a daily basis. The top keywords for accessing the writings of Matt Howell, in order?
Well, welcome back, visitors -- I'm glad to be back online and writing anew. Here's to a year of posting regularly and not getting burned out!
Update: Oh, and when I get around to it, I'm going to redesign this tired old design. There are some readability issues too, which I am to ameliorate.
Posted by Matt at 5:55 PM
Everybody here was hired
Great news today --
I just got my first job working at a law firm. Which is excellent news -- I decided back in March that my new plan would be to apply to law school for fall 2005. In the meantime, though, there were lots of things I could do to improve the quality of my application -- like, volunteer at CASA. Or work in a law firm and get some actual experience in the business!
So today is a major milestone in working towards a goal I set back in March.
I've got to say, there's nothing that feels as good as achieving a goal you've committed to.
Posted by Matt at 2:49 PM
Humorous link of the day
I just love Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. Triumph does the weather? Priceless! "Hurricane Isabella couldn't mess up your hair, anchor guy!"
Posted by Matt at 2:30 PM
Love haiku #1
from an old man to his fresh young honey
Had I a sawbuck
every time I thought of you,
I'd have, like, ten G's.
which doesn't buy nearly what it used to, not that that fact diminishes at all how much I think about you, my lil' lizzady.
...did I get the lingo right?
Deference to Jeff G, the master of this stuff and nonsense.
Posted by Matt at 7:38 AM
July 26, 2004
I'm what now?
You're A People's History of the United States! by Howard Zinn
After years of listening to other peoples' lies, you decided you've had enough. Now you're out to tell it like it is, with all the gory details and nothing left out. Instead of respecting leaders, you want to know what the common people have to offer. But this revolution still has a long way to go, and you're not against making a little profit while you wait. Honesty is your best policy.
How very... patriotic... of me. But I mean, yeah, other than the sharing all the gory details and stuff, that's pretty much on.
Take the Book Quiz at the Blue Pyramid.
Posted by Matt at 10:58 PM
Quote of the day
"I will stand up and struggle, as others have, to try to get that right balance between violence, and sex, and things." -- John Kerry
Opinion Journal caught it.
Posted by Matt at 2:13 PM
July 25, 2004
Lance à gagné son sixième tour
President Bush called soon after his fellow Texan crossed the finish line. “You’re awesome,” Bush told him.Of course my favorite quote about just how awesome Lance Armstrong is, comes straight from the man himself:
Lance Armstrong: Hey, aren't you Peter La Fleur?
Peter La Fleur: Lance Armstrong!
Lance Armstrong: Ya, that's me. But I'm a big fan of yours.
Peter La Fleur: Really?
Lance Armstrong: Ya, I've been watching the dodgeball tournament on the Ocho. ESPN 8. I just can't get enough of it. Good luck in the tournament. I'm really pulling for you against those jerks from Globo Gym. I think you better hurry up or you're gonna be late.
Peter La Fleur: Uh, actually I decided to quit... Lance.
Lance Armstrong: Quit? You know, once I was thinking of quitting when I was diagnosed with brain, lung and testicular cancer all at the same time. But with the love and support of my friends and family, I got back on the bike and won the Tour de France five [make that six] times in a row. But I'm sure you have a good reason to quit. So what are you dying of that's keeping you from the finals?
Peter La Fleur: Right now it feels a little bit like... shame.
Lance Armstrong: Well, I guess if a person never quit when the going got tough, they wouldn't anything to regret for the rest of their life. Well good luck to you Peter. I'm sure this decision won't haunt you forever.
Posted by Matt at 11:42 PM
Today's Instant Karma
Just three of 8,879 ways to give yourself and others good fortune right now...
- give an off-the-cuff compliment
- say little
- clean up after a great meal that someone prepared for you
...enumerated in this book: instant karma: 8,879 ways to give yourself and others good fortune right now.
Posted by Matt at 11:23 PM
I am the zen master (returned, from meandering hillsides, or some such)...
This blog is now back
after having long checked out.
A tree falls... sound made.
Ah, life. It sure is interesting, it is, it is. At least mine has been. Damn those Chinese and their ancient curses. In lieu of explanations, I provide just more old-fashioned blogging like you used to see from me on at least a daily basis.
It's good to be back. Will be seeing you again soon.
Posted by Matt at 11:16 PM
